Life in The Backseat

So life has taken a drastic turn for me! That is putting it very lightly to say the least. Just when I thought that things couldn't have slown down down anymore, my life been put on hold anymore than it already had been, my future been as unclear as it was, guess what! It can, and it did. So now the true questions that I am faced with are were do I go from here. Where is God in all of this? Does he even fit in anywhere in my life anymore? Today I thought of that song by Audio Adrenaline called Underdog. That gave me a twinge of hope, but then the anger and all those old feelings came back. When does God waive the white flag of surrender in our name to the devil? Does he ever? I know that we all have to suffer in this lifetime and I know that some greater than others for the good of others, but what if we are tired? Is that selfish? So for now my life once again is controlled even more so by the reliance on others. I must say that life in the backseat is not were I am comfortable.