So yesterday I spent alot of time downloading new songs for my Ipod. (yes I pd for them) I am very selective about which songs I want and what the message is that I want to listen to. Ever since I have got back from Kenya I have been struggling with worship. When I was in Kenya I felt so free in my worship and it was so authentic. I could dance lift my one arm and just let loose. Here back in TX I feel so confined. I have been trying to figure out and have been struggling to recreate that same experience. As I began to listen to some of the great gospel songs that I downloaded I got up and started dancing and just let loose. I am starting to realize that whether it be in my car, in my office, in church service or in Kenya, I can meet God in worship in that same real way as long as I don't put God in a box. I was putting limitations on Him and how intimate of worship I could have with him. I would allow life circumstances get in my way and loose focus on the purpose that was set out before me. I will now go into worship multiple times a day through the music that speaks to me and clear my mind of all things and pour my heart out to God with purpose.
Side Note: I think that it is great when I am worshipping in my car and people drive up beside me and I am wrapped up in the moment and then I catch an eye of someone and they are laughing because all they see in the car is me, but little do they know I am not alone!
Walking By Grace
Michelle
Sunday, August 29, 2010
Saturday, August 28, 2010
Journal Entry from Kenya
July 16th
We are riding in the bus to "The Rock", but we just left a school that had a section for special education. There was a little girl there that had downs, her name was Michelle. Before we even introduced ourselves to the kids, or anything she came straight for me and wanted me to hold her and to sit in my lap. This little girl played on my lap and laughed and giggled and gave me hugs. It was amazing to see. Jen got up and talked to the children and as she did God began to change my heart. He broke me. I started crying as I held this precious child who sat on my lap loving a complete stranger. I knew in my heart at that moment that if for some reason I were to have a special needs child I would be able to accept that child and know that the child would truly be capable of loving me. I am in aww of how much God loves me and how he orchestrated this visit to this school and even brought a little girl with my name! How Awesome is that!
That was one of my many journal entries. I felt that I needed to share this. At times I have people ask me what did God reveal to you on your trip? How was it? So many questions and I am so overwhelmed by the love that I felt in so many different forms! I can honeslty say that I know that Jesus loves me. There are times that satan will try to put doubt in my mind and I just have to go back and read things like this. I go in the Word and read of the ultimate sacrifice of love and I know that I am loved by at least One. That is all that matters! My prayer is that you will know that Jesus loves you and that no matter what it is that you are going through in your life He can help you through it. You just have to open up your heart to Him.
Walking By Grace
Michelle
We are riding in the bus to "The Rock", but we just left a school that had a section for special education. There was a little girl there that had downs, her name was Michelle. Before we even introduced ourselves to the kids, or anything she came straight for me and wanted me to hold her and to sit in my lap. This little girl played on my lap and laughed and giggled and gave me hugs. It was amazing to see. Jen got up and talked to the children and as she did God began to change my heart. He broke me. I started crying as I held this precious child who sat on my lap loving a complete stranger. I knew in my heart at that moment that if for some reason I were to have a special needs child I would be able to accept that child and know that the child would truly be capable of loving me. I am in aww of how much God loves me and how he orchestrated this visit to this school and even brought a little girl with my name! How Awesome is that!
That was one of my many journal entries. I felt that I needed to share this. At times I have people ask me what did God reveal to you on your trip? How was it? So many questions and I am so overwhelmed by the love that I felt in so many different forms! I can honeslty say that I know that Jesus loves me. There are times that satan will try to put doubt in my mind and I just have to go back and read things like this. I go in the Word and read of the ultimate sacrifice of love and I know that I am loved by at least One. That is all that matters! My prayer is that you will know that Jesus loves you and that no matter what it is that you are going through in your life He can help you through it. You just have to open up your heart to Him.
Walking By Grace
Michelle
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